This was my last time to be in a Labor and Delivery room and a Postpartum Recovery room.
After 9 years of pregnancy, yes, I have been pregnant every year for the past 9 years, 4 pregnancy losses and 5 full term babies, the Lord has closed my womb.
Out of my 5 full term births, 3 of them were c-sections. They actually followed a pattern: section, VBAC (vaginal birth after c-section), section, VBAC, section. We prayed that this last pregnancy would end up with a successful VBAC, yet despite all our attempts to help turn baby head down, nothing worked. Even when everything looked favorable for a successful turn, that wasn't a part of God's plan.
The "best" external cephalic version (manually turning baby) doctor in our practice attempted to turn baby twice but baby just kept returning to her oblique position in the womb. The doctor couldn't figure out why our what kept causing baby to return to that position. Yet, the doctor still had hope and was confident that baby would turn with true labor contractions.
Since I struggled with preterm labor contractions beginning at 31weeks, I wasn't sure if I would really be able to tell if I was in true labor or not. I had many "false" alarms. So, as I felt contractions on Friday, November 22nd, I had no clue that those may have been real labor contractions. In fact, I was setting up child care for the following week because my parents were scheduled to leave, Monday, November 25th. I was also preparing my mind for a scheduled c-section because the doctor didn't want me to go past 40.5 weeks. As I laid in bed on Saturday morning I felt a strong contraction and thought that it was pretty strong. In the middle of that thought, I felt a pop, and I then exclaimed that my water broke. The doctor told me to get to the hospital right away if my water broke because if baby was still not head down the umbilical cord could come out first which would cut out the oxygen supply from baby. We got to the hospital within 15 minutes. I was checked for position of baby and she was still not head down. My cervix was already 4cm dilated and fully effaced. I was prepped for a c-section immediately.
It was a complicated c-section. There was a lot of built up scar tissue from my previous section and the doctor had a difficult time getting to my uterus. She explained, "it's a big mess!" The doctor needed help through the surgery and called another doctor in to coach her. Once at my uterus she didn't know if she had enough room to get baby out. At one point she thought about doing the old c-section method which would be cutting down the midline of my belly. She moved away from that idea because she didn't know how to make the cut. She had several people push down on my belly and baby was born at 9:58am, 9 lbs 3 oz, 20.5 inches long.
It took the whole duration of the spinal to finish up the procedure. I was beginning to gain back feeling as they closed up the last of the incision. The doctor again repeated to me what a mess everything was. She told me that scar tissue had formed around internal parts and the internals and uterus healed as 1. For example, my bladder and uterus are stuck together as 1. I'm not sure what other internal parts are now one but the doctor advised no more children because there would be no way to deliver another baby except through a c-section and another c-section would lead to a hysterectomy.
Healing has been difficult. Since the procedure was more complicated than usual I've had more pain than I ever remember with the other sections. I also hemorrhaged a lot and was in danger of a blood transfusion. I'm so thankful I didn't need one but my hemoglobin had gone down to a 6.8. Praising God that the count remained stable and I didn't get light headed.
I am so thankful that there were some who wanted to come visit us at the hospital. Only my children and those watching them at that time were allowed to visit. I declined your offer to visit because I was in so much pain that most of my stay at the hospital was trying to figure out how to manage the pain so that I could go home ready with a plan.
It's gonna get crazy but praising God for His wisdom and strength!
Well, the Lord gave us 5 beautiful and healthy babies through this journey of child bearing years and though He has now taken away the opportunity to bear any more, we bless His name and praise Him for God is God! It's a bittersweet ending but 'tis the life of a Christian.
Answered prayers:
- It's really neat to see how my parents got to meet baby before they left for home. We got nervous the Friday before they left. There were no signs of labor. Yet God is good and His timing is perfect.
- It's ironic that I asked my parents to come early so that I wouldn't have to inconvenience the church body for much help, yet God is allowing baby to live up to the meaning of her name and He is telling me that He is faithful and He displays who He is through His body. So, when you have fellowship with Christ you also have fellowship with one another and God's commandments fall on the 2 greatest which is of loving God first and then loving others next.
- The bed rest taught me how to stop and be still and that lesson has helped me to be still throughout the third trimester and now through this healing time.
- I am thankful the Lord answered our prayers about expanding our family. The use of birth control has always been a difficult issue between Hubby and I. We wanted to do God's will regarding the size of our family but we were never clear
about how big. As I struggled with miscarriages and difficult pregnancies, I began to wonder if I was limiting God when I desired to be done because of all the difficulties. Was this my call to suffering? It brings me much relief that Hubby and I did not have to decide to stop at 5 living children but that the Lord directed the situation that way. When people now ask if we're going to keep trying for that boy, we can now say with confidence, "No, it isn't God's will," and the answer is absolutely clear, "I can't have any more children." I am thankful how God knows us so well!
- It's really neat to see how my parents got to meet baby before they left for home. We got nervous the Friday before they left. There were no signs of labor. Yet God is good and His timing is perfect.
- It's ironic that I asked my parents to come early so that I wouldn't have to inconvenience the church body for much help, yet God is allowing baby to live up to the meaning of her name and He is telling me that He is faithful and He displays who He is through His body. So, when you have fellowship with Christ you also have fellowship with one another and God's commandments fall on the 2 greatest which is of loving God first and then loving others next.
- The bed rest taught me how to stop and be still and that lesson has helped me to be still throughout the third trimester and now through this healing time.
- I am thankful the Lord answered our prayers about expanding our family. The use of birth control has always been a difficult issue between Hubby and I. We wanted to do God's will regarding the size of our family but we were never clear
about how big. As I struggled with miscarriages and difficult pregnancies, I began to wonder if I was limiting God when I desired to be done because of all the difficulties. Was this my call to suffering? It brings me much relief that Hubby and I did not have to decide to stop at 5 living children but that the Lord directed the situation that way. When people now ask if we're going to keep trying for that boy, we can now say with confidence, "No, it isn't God's will," and the answer is absolutely clear, "I can't have any more children." I am thankful how God knows us so well!
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